How to keep feeling safe when you're in love

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There’s always an excuse to be careful, not to jump into the big adventure of love. This is how you keep feeling safe in love.

There are several reasons why we deny ourselves the biggest and greatest things when it comes to love. Some of us have been hurt before, and created a protective shield afterwards, others are convinced they are not worthy of love and they are scared to believe in it.

There’s always an excuse to be careful, not to jump into the big adventure of love, but to keep a back door open.

Fall in love

We don’t call it ‘falling in love’ for no reason. You fall. There you go. All your thoughts and feelings regard this one person, you think the world of them and you would be willing to change your life fort hem. You are filled with hope, of course, but there’s fear too. And there’s doubt: do your feelings mean that there are great things lying ahead of you, are you catching a glimpse of a glorious truth or is it a trap, a chimera, self deceit?  

These five tips help you to feel safe when you’re in love

1.   Let your heart set the pace. Don’t say or do anything that makes things go any faster than you feel comfortable with.

2.   Try to e-mail and text less, and see your love face to face more often. This is a good way to keep your connection pure, and to prevent yourself from creating an ideal picture.  

3.   Get to know them, talk to their friends, see how they were before you met them.

4.   Think of your relationship as something that might last and talk about it this way.

5.   Try to really get to know them. Don’t focus on ‘do they like me’, but ask yourself regularly: ‘do I like them?’


Photo: Montse Monmo